Category: Questions Answered

I Swear It’s Not Angry Music

What is your favorite genre of music?

My favorite genre of music is “heavy” metal. I say that because the bands I listen to fall into many sub-genres of metal. Some of the bands I listen to are so much heavier than the others. I wasn’t always into metal music. I only started getting into it when I was in my teens. Before that, I mainly listened to classic rock and country. And, as a surprise to many people, the Backstreet Boys.

The band that got me into metal was Metallica. They’re one of the first heavy bands I remember listening to. Aside from Metallica, I also remember listening to Linkin Park (Hybrid Theory and Meteora), as well as System of a Down. I remember feeling like listening to System of a Down made me a rebellious teenager. I just saw System of a Down live for a second time this summer and they put on an amazing show!

As I got older, my tastes expanded. By the time I reached high school, I was listening to Deathstars, Cradle of Filth, and Marilyn Manson. I remember making a mix CD to play in my CD player on the way to school (yes I’m old). Deathstars and Cradle of Filth were also my introduction to screaming vocals. Cradle of Filth is still active, but it’s been some time since Deathstars has put out an album. I’ll occasionally listen to both, but not as much as I once used to.

From there everything is a blur. I got into more bands. Some heavy others not. My first ever concert was Volbeat, Lacuna Coil, Motorhead, and Megadeth. I don’t remember what year that was, but it was an awesome show. I saw them at the Aragon Ballroom in Chicago, IL. I’ve since seen Nightwish there as well as Epica and Sabaton.

For a long time, Iron Maiden had been my favorite band. I’ve seen them live 3 times so far. As time went on, Sabaton took the number 1 spot. I’ve also seen Sabaton 3 times. Currently, I think the number 1 spot belongs to Lorna Shore. I’ve seen them twice, once as a headliner, but they are all such talented individuals.

Funny thing with Lorna Shore, I could never listen to deathcore. I felt like my head would explode. My actual introduction to Lorna Shore was on TikTok. I had come across the final breakdown in “To the Hellfire” and thought it was from a Call of Duty zombies video. I was so completely wrong. Even after hearing that, I didn’t listen to them.

It wasn’t until Pain Remains that I gave them a legitimate chance. Pain Remains changed everything for me. I thought Pain Remains was as good as it would get for Lorna Shore and deathcore. Then they released a new album this year called I Feel The Everblack Festering Within Me. It’s just as good, if not better than Pain Remains. Lorna Shore has written several songs that just hit you right in the feels. They’re relatable and that’s why I love them so much. Their music speaks directly to me in a way no band has ever been able to do before.

I often say silly things like “I listen to angry music because it makes me happy.” Or my other favorite thing to say at work is “They scream in my ear so I don’t scream out loud.” It’s dumb, but it’s also true. Some things can’t be sung. They have to be screamed. And when I hear that screaming in my ear, everything feels OK. It’s the calm I need in a sea of chaos. The heavy music and screaming keeps me calm in stressful situations. And that’s something I’ll forever be grateful for.

Reflections on High School: What I Learned

Describe something you learned in high school.

My four years in high school were some of my least favorite years. I know for some people, it’s the greatest time ever. Well, I never had that feeling. I wasn’t popular or well liked. But now that I’ve been out of high school for about 15 years, I feel like I can look back on it and really talk about it. I don’t regret who I was then or who I am now. The things that happened then, helped shape me into who I am today.

My freshman year was, and always will be my favorite year of high school. The school I went to felt like home. I felt like I belonged there. My older brother spent all four years of high school there, too. I was familiar with it, and going somewhere else just wasn’t an option. Then they closed the school down at the end of my freshman year.

It crushed me, and to make a long story short, I eventually decided to go to a high school in the suburbs. Was it a good decision? No. Was it a bad decision? Also, no. It was a decision I made and then had to live with.

Some of those people were nice to me. Some of those people were not so nice to me. And some of them didn’t care about me either way. Personally, I never felt like I fit in anywhere while I was there. I played golf and baseball, and I had also joined the chess club, but I always felt like I was on the outside looking in.

I’m pretty sure my sophomore and junior year I ate lunch with just one other person. We were the “weird” ones. My senior year, I ate lunch with a few other people, mostly the “nerds.” I was OK with that because I was, and still am kind of a nerd.

During my junior year, another school closed down. A bunch of those kids came to where I was going. A lot of them were devastated, and I knew how they felt. I was one of the only ones who did. But what that also brought over was a whole new era of trouble.

I feel like I flew under the radar most of high school. I didn’t cause any problems. I tried to avoid drama. I did play sports, but I wasn’t a top athlete. My senior year was different. It’s like I got noticed all of a sudden. And once I got noticed, I was an easy target.

I was bullied quite a bit my senior year. I never said anything about it because I didn’t see the point. I knew I just had to finish my senior year and then I’d never have to see those people again. To this day I’ve only seen a handful of the people from my senior class, mostly by chance and not because I wanted to. The ones who treated me well will be greeted with respect. The others? I’m not sure. I guess we’ll see if I ever cross that bridge.

So, what did I learn from high school?

I learned that just because you’re popular in high school, it doesn’t mean anything. Sure people want to be like you, and they always want to be around you. But once you leave, no one cares.

I learned that even if you feel alone, you aren’t. There’s always someone else to talk to or hang around. There are more people like you than you think.

I learned that bullies prey on the weak. They always go after those smaller and weaker than them. They abuse others to feel like their lives are better than they are. Bullies are the weakest people.

I learned that a few years after high school you’re mostly forgotten. I was on the baseball team that went to State. We didn’t win State, but I could walk back into the school today and no one would know who I am. They wouldn’t care either.

I learned that being true to who you are is more important than anything else. Never give into peer pressure if it feels wrong. I avoided high school drinking and parties and I don’t regret it for a second.

I know my high school experience isn’t a one size fits all. Everyone experiences different things and situations. I truly did love my freshman year of high school. I was excited to be there. I was treated well. I felt like I belonged. After that, everything changed. But in a way, I’m kind of glad it happened. Without it, I don’t think I’d be the person I am today.

10 Years From Now…

Where do you see yourself in 10 years?

It’s hard to imagine where we will be any amount of time from now. So much can change between now and then. Some things we can control, others maybe not. All we can do is make the best of what we’re given, when we’re given it.

To explain where I want to be in 10 years, I should first explain where I am now. I’m almost 34 years old, I work at an ice rink, and I just got an AAS in motion picture and TV production in May. I’ve been doing ice rink work for the last 14 years. As for the degree, I haven’t found a job yet, but I have been writing and producing a series for YouTube which can be found here. The series is called My Video Journal. I’m very proud of it, and with season 1 coming to an end, I can’t wait to work on season 2.

So in 10 years what do I want to change? Well, for starters, I’d be approaching my mid-40’s. I hope I’m married by then, but who knows (still very single). As much as I love doing ice rink work, I hope to have a job in the film industry. Since I spent 15 years in college and got my degree in video production, getting a job in that field is the ultimate goal.

One idea I had not long ago was the possibility of being a history teacher. I love history, mostly American, but I don’t like teaching. If I was going to teach, I’d want the students to be into what I’m teaching. I know that some will be while others aren’t, but I think it also matters what age level you teach as well.

In any case, my goal for 10 years from now is to be working on movies or TV shows. While I do that, I will always work on stuff for YouTube as long as YouTube exists. Not only that, but anything I do for YouTube is experience I can show potential employers later.

There’s no telling where I’ll be in 10 years. I could be doing the same thing I am now, but I hope not. I am currently working toward a better future for myself one day at a time. The film industry is highly competitive, but I know I can make it there if I try hard enough. That’s the goal. And while I’m not there yet, I’m certain I will be one day.

Winter is the Best Season

How do you feel about cold weather?

As a resident of the Midwest, I absolutely love Winter. I know a lot of people who hate it, but it’s definitely my favorite time of the year. To be fair, I don’t actually like being cold. I hate being cold, but I absolutely love being in the cold. I love it when things freeze over. I love it when it snows. It’s just my favorite time of the year.

One reason I love the cold so much is because I do play hockey. While I do play hockey indoors (most of the time), I do like skating outside and occasionally playing hockey outside. This winter, I had the opportunity to play hockey outside three times. It was nice because it reminded me of where I started. I learned to play on a pond over 15 years ago, and those were some of the best winters I’ve ever had.

Secondly, I love skiing, and I ski at least once a winter. I usually go skiing with some family and friends. We try to go to Colorado, but it doesn’t always work out that way, mostly because of the cost. Colorado is expensive and we go for a week. Not to mention, ski lift tickets are way more expensive now than they were five years ago. If we don’t get the chance to go to Colorado, we just head up to Wisconsin. Our resort of choice in Colorado is Winter Park, and recently, we’ve been going to Granite Peak in Wisconsin.

As for Wisconsin, Wilmont is too easy for us. Alpine Valley is ok, but still too easy. Cascade is fun, and we spent a lot of time there over the years. We started going to Granite Peak more recently because we wanted something new in Wisconsin. It’s a fun time there, but nothing in the Midwest can compare to Colorado. Colorado is just magical. We did make it to Colorado in January of 2025, but unfortunately, we all took turns with the Norovirus. It was not our most fun trip.

I am still editing a ski trip video that you’ll be able to watch on my YouTube channel here. As of posting this blog post, I have not finished editing the video yet. I’ve definitely been slacking on it, but you can watch ski trips from past years. They’re all up there, from Wisconsin to Colorado.

Overall, I love the winters here even though they’ve gotten warmer as time goes on. I don’t think I’d ever move somewhere warmer, though. And if I did, it would be to Colorado. There’s just something magical about winter in the Midwest that I don’t think I could ever leave behind.

The Next Six Months

What is the biggest challenge you will face in the next six months?

The next six months will be interesting to say the least. There’s a lot I need to finish, and at times, it can feel overwhelming to think about all at once. I have to remind myself to take it day by day. I’ll talk about each item individually below. They aren’t in any particular order.

The first thing that I need to do is help with the post-production on the film I worked on last semester called Epochal. We made it as a part of our Advanced Film Production class. My job on the film was sound designer. It was my first time doing sound design, and my job isn’t done. Once we have the picture locked, I can work on adding sounds and music. There’s a good chance we’ll need to do Foley for it as well. I’m actually really excited about it.

The second thing is I need to finish my last class for my degree. I’m taking cinematography, and it is the final class I need for an A.A.S. in TV and movie production. I’ve been in college since I was 18 (that’s roughly 15 years). I spent a majority of that time not knowing what I wanted to do. It wasn’t until 2017, when I took a class called Intro to Motion Pictures & TV, that I discovered what I wanted to do. I want to work on TV shows and/or movies. That’s the goal. My dream job is screenwriter/director, but I also love editing videos. I still edit videos weekly. Most of what I edit is my own gaming videos that I post to YouTube, but I’ll edit videos for people if they ask me to.

The final challenge of the next six months will be finding a job in the motion picture and TV field. The film industry is a hard one to get into, and having a degree doesn’t guarantee a job. To start, I’d be looking for any job in video work. I feel like I’m a pretty good video editor, so I’d probably start there to build up a portfolio of work. I have done work for people in the past, so I wouldn’t be starting from zero. I’d be adding onto what I already have. While my future is uncertain, I am positive that I will find a job in that field. It’ll just take some time.