Tag: struggle

If I Could Change My Past, Would I?

What advice would you give to your teenage self?

Over the past few weeks, I’ve been wondering about what I would do if I had a time machine and could go back in time. It’s quite an interesting question to give yourself. Would you tell yourself what’s coming? Would you not tell yourself, knowing that what’s coming could be good or bad? Would you go back at all?

I’m 31, and while I’m not exactly old, I’ve lived a bit. I’ve done things I’m proud of, I’ve done things I’m not proud of. I’ve done things I’d love to relive, I’ve done things I’d wish to forget. I’ve had my regrets. I’ve overcome those regrets. I’ve lived my life, and I’ve played it safe.

So, if I had a time machine, would I go back in time? The short answer: yes.

What advice would I give myself? That’s a hard question to answer. I don’t think there’s any one answer to that question. I wouldn’t tell myself everything to come. That would ruin the fun. But if I could say only one thing, it would be this, “While life may be difficult and it might suck, it will always get better. The rough times don’t last, and the good memories will always outweigh the bad.”

I wouldn’t change my past or try to warn myself of what’s to come. The reason I am who I am is because of the life I’ve lived. And as much as I’d like to live a different life, I don’t think I ever could. To live a different life would mean that I’m no longer me. I’d be a variation of me.

I’m proud of who I am and what I’ve done to get here. Life isn’t always rainbows and sunshine. As long as we make the best of the time we have, that’s something to be proud of. Nothing will ever be truly perfect, but we can make moments perfect for a short time.

I Am Who I Am

I’ve been reflecting lately. On 2021. On my life. On the things I’ve done and haven’t done. Not in a bad way. More like a reflection of my past to better understand the present and the future.

It’s weird. Because from the time I turned 18 until I was in my late 20s, I sort of struggled with who I was. I didn’t know what career I wanted. I didn’t fully know who I was as a person. I didn’t know if I had any skills that were worth anything. I wasn’t necessarily a mess, it was just a decade of discovery for me.

The weird thing is, once I hit 30, all of that kind of changed. Well, most of it. Ok, only some of it. I discovered who I was in my late 20s. The person I am, my values and traits, that was all locked in. But something kind of funny happened. Something I didn’t expect. I stopped caring.

What do I mean by that? It’s simple. I stopped giving a shit about what other people thought of me. Last year I read a book called The Subtle Art of not Giving a F*ck. It was a great read and I recommend it to everyone. After reading that book, I was left speechless. I realized that I put way too much effort into things I couldn’t control. About a year later, I finally started taking the advice from the book.

We can’t control everything. We can’t control how people view us. We can’t control what they think of us. We can’t control what they say about us either. But we can control how we react to things. And once I hit 30, I literally decided that people’s opinions of me didn’t matter anymore. If they talk trash about me, that doesn’t matter either. I know who I am and I’m not changing for anyone. I know I can’t control what people say about me, but I can control how I react. And how will I react? I’ll act like I don’t don’t care anymore because I don’t.